Lara Zielin

I am so pumped! Donut Days is listed on the teenreadstoo.com website as one of their “gotta have ‘em” forthcoming books. Cool!

STATUS: Sorely disappointed with the Travel Channel’s “Ghost Adventurers” show, which I’d been looking forward to all week. Frat boys with infrared cameras are super annoying. Trust me on this one.

FAVE LINKEY-POO RIGHT THIS SECOND: Chong sent this one, which reflects not only a bad idea for a Halloween costume, but bad parenting as well.

Rob found a recipe for these little meringue ghosts, and last night he made them. And I have to say, they turned out so well! Look at how fierce!

Here is the whole army of them, ready to scare the pants off your tastebuds. Boo!

STATUS: It’s Friday! Woo to the hoo!

FAVE LINKEY-POO RIGHT THIS SECOND: Rob found the Cake Wrecks blog, showcasing all things hilarious and horrible in cakes. Brilliant.

I’d like to take this moment to thank Kenley for the life lessons she conveyed — deliberately or not — during her time on Project Runway. True, the show is about fashion, but Kenley’s mistakes translate to any art. We can all learn from her blunders. So her are five lessons I personally took away from Kenley’s overbearing, rope-loving 15 minutes, which I will endeavor to apply to my writing:

1.) LOOK AT OTHER PEOPLE’S COLLECTIONS.
Kenley said, and I quote, “I don’t look at other people’s collections.” Then the judges nailed her at least four times for creating copy-cat outfits that other famous, established designers had already nailed. I’m convinced that’s why she was the first one off the runway in the finale. Which begs the question, why not look at other designer’s collections? What’s the harm? Dude, in writing, if I’m not reading the other YA that’s out there, I’m screwed. I don’t want to copy someone, certainly, but the truth is YA is always changing and evolving. What was published 10, even 5, years ago probably wouldn’t fly today. So it’s important to stay current and read what’s winning awards and what the masses are really loving. Seriously — look at other people’s collections.

2.) HAVE COHESION IN YOUR COLLECTION
Okay, Kenley wasn’t terrible at this. I’ll admit it. But she also wasn’t the winner so there. What this means is that good fashion — and I’d argue good writing — has to come to the table (or the runway) with a strong point of view. And when people see or read your stuff, they should immediately recognize it as yours. In writing, we call this voice. What is your perspective? What’s new and fresh about what you’re doing? What are you trying to say about life, about the world? This is hard as crap to do. I’m not an expert at it, god knows. But all my books had better have it or I’m going to be aut.

3.) LISTEN TO TIM GUNN
If we have experts in our lives, or even smart friends who are willing to offer up their opinions on our stuff, by golly we’d better listen to them. Kenley never listened to Tim Gunn. In fact, she was downright rude to him when he offered his sage advice. Uh, hello, plaid fairy dress anyone? Gah. Look, we all need editors — whether they’re editing our clothes, our writing, our attitudes, whatever. It doesn’t matter. But if we stop listening to the people who are trying to help us, we’re in a whole world of trouble.

4.) DON’T ALIENATE YOUR PEERS
Competition is never easy. But that doesn’t mean our competitors are our enemies. The experiences and perspectives of your peers is enormously valuable in fashion, in writing … anywhere. So when you act like a jerk and think you’re better than everyone around you, it doesn’t make people want to exactly help you, or offer tips and advice. In one episode, Kenley forgot her tulle and there were two other designers with tulle to spare. But did they want to help her? Nope. Look, none of us create our art in a vacuum. We need other people, other creative types. So when I’m out there looking for blurbs or a good review, I don’t want a reputation as a jerkface that makes people want to slam doors in my face.

5.) EVERYBODY’S POOP SMELLS
Everyone’s. Which means that not everything we do is going to smell like flowers all the time. Yet there was never a time when Kenley was humble enough to say to the judges, “You know what? You’re right. This did miss the mark and I can do better.” Not once did she even come close to that level of humility. Which is a shame because everyone can do better. But if we think we’re always crapping rainbows, then we never try to make our crap better. We’ll go around thinking our crap is awesome. And crap, folks, is never awesome. So when someone points to your high-waisted pants and says, “that’s not hip-hop, that’s crap,” then listen to them. It hurts, it sucks, but you can’t improve until you stop thinking you walk on water.

STATUS: When Project Runway ends tonight, I’ll have to get a life and stop living through reality television … but only until TOP CHEF starts in a few weeks! Woo hoo!

FAVE LINKEY-POO RIGHT THIS SECOND: Without a doubt, it’s the literal translation of “Take On Me” by Ah-ha.  

I am scared of the dark, and for most of my life I’ve slept with a night light. Recently I needed a new one and, at a local antique store, I discovered the most kitschy, fabulous night-light ever. It matched the bedroom colors, and it was fashioned in the shape of kitties. Kitties that light up! It was win-win…until I got it home. 

By day, fabulous.  

By night, evil.   

Now I have another reason to be scared of the dark.  

Star sighting! Right here on this blog!

My parents dug up this photo. All its pixelated fabulousness clearly reveals that I was glamorous from a young age.

I know it might be tough to look at for some. Great genes, I got ‘em. Don’t be hatin’, people.  Please, don’t be hatin’.

STATUS: Irritated that Heidi rewarded all the Project Runway designers’ bad outfits by allowing them to make entire collections. Whatever.

FAVE LINKEY-POO RIGHT THIS SECOND: Lord of the Rings clips showcasing really bad foreign subtitles.

So, remember the beginning part in Team America: World Police where terrorists have a WMD in Paris and Team America arrives on the scene to stop them? And remember how Team America blows up everything — from the Eiffel Tower to the Louvre — and then concludes “Everything is bon”?

Well, call me Joe Sixpack and color me a taxpayer, but I think that’s exactly what this $700 billion bailout is like. We’re the citizens of France, only instead of watching our national treasures explode, we’re watching our economy implode. And the government is Team America wading in with their $700 billion bailout and saying, “Everything is bon! We’ve saved you!”

Uh, thanks but no thanks. I’ll take my chances with the WMD.